I was walking to the market today to run some errands for Mummy, still feeling really proud of myself because last night at the Passover feast I recited my four questions without stammering, and Granddad was so proud he gave me a red big boy’s blanket, it was so big and so cozy that I was determined to sleep in it every night forever, and just as I was rounding the corner I saw a group of grownups gather, well grownups gather all the time but this time they were so loud and so angry, turns out someone by the name of Yeshua was going to be flogged for some crime, well Daddy always told me to stay away from public punishments, especially the Roman ones, but today I was so curious that I stayed on to see what was going to happen.
The man who was to be flogged was oddly calm, which was unlike the typical criminal who would always scream and curse, well flogging is such a nasty punishment, I’ve seen it twice and in both cases the men died from their wounds shortly after, but this man’s flogging was by far the worst I’ve seen, the Roman soldiers struck him with such force and such purpose it was as if they lived their whole lives for this very moment, and the poor man’s back was ploughed open as if he was just made of dirt, well Mummy always scolded me if I came home from playing covered in dirt, and I began to wonder whether this man, like dirt, could feel no pain, because he was so silent, like a lamb, but I looked closer and I could see him flinching and twisting in agony, I could see him biting his lips so hard that they bled, I could see that his eyes were rolled all the way back, and I concluded that no, unlike dirt this man could definitely feel pain, and my heart pitied him sorely, I could see his blood gushing forth, red like the wine from last night’s feast, and after what seemed like a very long time, the flogging was done, the poor man so bloody he looked as if he had a red blanket draped over him, such was the destruction of his body, he looked like some animal carcass, and I was reminded again of last night when Daddy sacrificed a lamb and I being a big boy held the lamb down, and what a pity that a man could be reduced to that, the air smelling of blood and raw flesh and wrath as the poor man was dragged away.
The man was then sent to be crucified, and out of more curiosity and more pity I followed him as he carried his cross outside the city, I saw the Roman soldiers nail his hands and his feet to the cross, the nails so massive I wondered whether they were made just for this purpose or whether they were leftovers from a carpenter’s workshop, they made this loud ting ting ting sound as they were hammered into him, the crowd again so loud and so angry, shouting at the man, mocking the man, but the man was either deaf or not paying attention, well he did look very very tired, as if he had the weight of the world on his shoulders, so I figured he was conserving his energy to, well, live a little longer, but eventually he did look up at them and I thought for sure he was going to say all the bad words that grownups are allowed to say but if I said them Mummy would pinch me on the cheeks, but instead he prayed to Yahweh to forgive them because they did not know what they were doing, and I pitied the poor man because he must be delirious from all the blood loss, because no one in their right mind would do such a thing, eventually the crowd started to disperse as time went on, I suddenly remembered that I was supposed to be at the market and was about to leave too when I heard the man scream, I mean he really screamed, screamed with all his might till his voice cracked, crying, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”, and in that moment I realized that the criminal on the cross was also someone’s son and that he must have a Daddy who loves him, or maybe a Daddy that loved him before but hates him now, such was the sense of abandonment in his voice that I wondered if he ever knew love at all.
When I returned home in the evening, Mummy asked me if I got this and that from the market and I said that I forgot because I saw someone crucified, I was sure Mummy would get angry and pinch me on the cheeks, but she didn’t and even tucked me into bed at night in my new red blanket, before I closed my eyes to sleep I made sure to say a prayer for that poor man who died on the cross today, I prayed as earnestly as I could for Yahweh to bless his loved ones and keep them safe, and that He would be gracious enough to bring something good, anything good, out of so tragic a death.
